Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Where is it Written?

Where is it written that because I'm a female that I'm supposed to be an expert in style, fashion, beauty and the kitchen? And where is it written that because I'm a female I'm supposed to have a gut instinct more accurate than Doppler radar?

Can someone tell me which book or give me the web address? I'd like to challenge the inidvidual that has given the world and especially us females the impression that all women are born with the innate knowledge and or desire to always look beautiful, to be able to go into any closet and throw together the perfect outfit and to be able to cook gourmet dishes that guests rave about and weren't cooked in the microwave. Because my friends, I didn't come with these genes.

I'm comfortable leaving the house in clean clothes that match, sporting the easiest hairstyle to maintain, wearing make-up only on special occasions and being able to cook and entire dinner in the microwave? But that doesn't mean I don't want to look fabulous, because I do just without a lot of effort and in a way that's practical.

All day I'm here chasing around my toddler, trying to pick up behind her, my husband and two large dogs and determine and prepare a healthy meal that also tastes good for my family. Now does that leave 1-2 hours for make-up application, an hour for my workout, time to buff and polish my nails (if I even have any left) or time to give the house a Martha Stewart make-over with a dinner that looks like it could be on the cover of Family Circle?

PLEASE! Now don't get me wrong, I love to shop, could spend an entire weekend at a spa getting made over and desperately need to take some cooking classes and would enjoy all of these things. Maybe what I need is the cast of "Let's Makeover Your Life" to come on over and give me some assistance. Oh wait, that's not a real show but would probably be what the producers would call it if they came to my house, flipped through my closet, pantry and cosmetic bag.

Now MC's one and she needs a haircut....our first style challenge that I will tackle. In reality she's needed a haircut for over a month but I've been obsessing about where to take her, when to take her and how to have it done. I don't want my comfort zone in casualville to necessarily be hers. But I don't want to raise a high maintenance diva either.

I'm surfing the web this week checking out new products, looking for Christmas ideas and just killing time when I came across a website that sells nail polish for young children. Its advertised as all natural, non-toxic polish that's as natural as mud. Now the children pictured on the website look as young as five years old. There are some of you reading this that say what's wrong with that...well I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that, I'm merely posing the question that if I start doing my little girl's nails at such a young age am I putting pressure on her to be a diva, a beauty queen, a fashionista, etc.

Now I know things have changed a lot since I was a child. You can drive down to the Galleria Mall here in Houston and see four year olds with their own cell phones, some of them PDAs or smartphones. No, I'm not kidding. My parents would ahve laughed me out of the house if I'd asked for a cell phone before I was 15. But things are different. Now children have cell phones, children not teenagers but children go to the salon to be buffed, polished, styled and made up. And since as I've said I'm not the most stylish person I'm wondering am I the one behind the times? Will I set my daughter up to be an outsider if she isn't getting her nails done like the other little girls?

I don't know and while I do care I think I'm just going to have to wing it. I buy cute clothes for MC from places like Gymboree, Children's Place and Carter's. She has cute little shoes from Stride-Rite. And I try to make sure her clothes always match, are free from stains and are age appropriate. I buy her dresses for pictures and on some occasions she wears them out. I don't think my parents ever put me in a dress until I was like 10, maybe older. And currently, I don't own a dress other than my wedding dress.

Its possible that if I walked into a thereapist's office today in my jeans, cowboy boots and t-shirt they would place the blame on my uneven nails, casual and plain appearance on my parents. They might say that if they made style, fashion and beauty a priority that I would also make it a priority today for myself and my daughter. But I don't believe it. I don't think that the reason my closet only has one dress in it has anything to do with my parents.

The reason I don't own dresses is I don't have anywhere to wear them. The reason my nails aren't buffed and polished is because keeping a house up and chasing a one year old would ruin them not long after having them done. I don't spend two hours everyday applying war paint because who would appreciate the time and effort to create my look, definitely not my one year old.

And hopefully as MC gets older and bigger and starts to communicate what she wants she'll understand that I'm a down to earth practical person. She's not going to have a cell phone when she's four or go to a salon for a mani/pedi before she's ten. Her closet won't be full of dresses, heels and outifts that can only be worn once. And she doesn't have to have all of the trimmings (make-up, nail polish, the latest haircut, designer dresses) to be a beautiful person. Her beauty wil be on the inside and all of the trimmings that she'll want and have in time are just a bonus not a necessity.

1 comment:

  1. I think the challenge is teaching MC that while it is okay to pamper yourself, it need not be a priority to maintain a flawless appearance at all times. Children need the opportunity to be just that, CHILDREN..which means going outside and getting muddy or playing in the kitchen with mom, not learning elaborate beauty rituals. MC will have plenty of time for that later. For those of us who have moms that don't prescribe to those elaborate rituals, we turned out just fine! so please don't stress. MC will have friends that can help her, but at least she will see that her mom is comfortable in her own skin, without expensive accoutrements as well as knowing what is really worth it - appreciating who you are on the inside.